The long path of diagnoses, some of which are not precise, leads in many cases, in adulthood, to a Borderline Personality Disorder, a serious and chronic mental disorder. Unlike reactive attachment disorder, borderline personality disorder may be due to genetic factors, abuse or neglect such as environmental and social factors, or brain disorders such as fetal alcohol spectrum disorders, or post-traumatic stress disorder, or early adversity. A BPD does not have the ability to calm down in times of stress, has many difficulties in self-regulation, has problems with emotions, thinking, behavior, self-image and social relationships. Emotions are not regulated. People with BPD may experience extreme mood swings and do not know who they are, so their interests and values ​​can change quickly. But why on so many occasions do TEAF boys and girls, after 15, 16, or 17 years old, when they become adults end up diagnosed with BPD? The key to a correct diagnosis is personal history, personal history is very necessary to know what should be the appropriate treatment. Many times missing important data, especially in boys and girls who come from international adoption and where reports are scanty, scarce and missing data, sometimes psychiatrists, psychologists, primary care doctors, do not have enough time to collect all the personal history data and be able to interconnect the data. And too often the general tone is to blame the parents, especially if they are adoptive.

What we really need as parents is, more than a specific diagnosis, therapies that work. Many of us have different diagnoses of our children, but the symptoms and the family situation is very similar, effective therapies that help us, that help our children to leave themselves and shine with their own light.

When a typical teenager gets angry, he can yell or slam. Our children throw objects, they injure themselves, they flee, they attack, they insult, they scream, they get totally out of control. When a typical teenager loses a friend, or a girlfriend, he mourns the loss and takes refuge in his friends. Our children isolate themselves, they feel totally hopeless and with a feeling of emptiness, but they will not express it. Normally, these disruptive behaviors in adolescence inevitably lead them to reside for some time in treatment centers, which are usually very expensive and quite ineffective. The experience of many families is that they return worse than they were and have incorporated worse habits, remember that the FASD act a lot by imitation, since they have a hard time distinguishing good from evil. Does Dialectic Behavioral Therapy and Mentalization-Based Therapy really work for FASD adolescent boys and girls? It seems to work for BPD patients, and since there are many FASD that end up being TLP and many TARs too, if used with FASD since early adolescence, could I avoid BPD in adulthood?

Some parents of FASD boys and girls recommend it: “My daughter spent 12 months in DBT group therapy with amazing results, after more than a decade of individual therapy sessions focusing on feelings that did not work.”

Source DBT group therapy helps develop emotional regulation skills, tolerance to frustration and interpersonal relationships, such as communication using mindfulness to focus on the present moment. What would happen if an adapted version of the dialectic behavioral therapy (DBT in English) was made from primary school, and continued in secondary school, before maladaptive behaviors develop? Skill training seems to be an important component of any Behavior Intervention Plan.